Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Getz


Arrived in Devonport on Sunday and as usual went straight to the Avis counter to pick up the car keys for the week. I didn't take much notice of the kind of car or even the brand. Just grabbed the keys and ticked and initialled all the appropriate boxes. Picked up my luggage and walked to the car park looking for bay 7.

There are two blocks of bays marked Avis and it took me a little while to find it, probably because I was looking for something a bit bigger than 4 wheelie bins stuck together. "Oh shit" I thought, as I noticed that what seemed to be bay 7 contained a tiny little yellow car. Yes it was a Hyundai Getz and it was mine for the week. Words to describe my initial mental images include cramped, noisy, gutless, and the-Fiat-500-that-George-Segal-drove-in-"A touch of class". My first inkling of what was to come was when I noticed that in their quest for economy, the company had for the firtst time given me a car with a manual gearbox!

From the first, it was like stepping back 30 years (in a good way) a bit like (I imagine) having a 23 year old girlfriend when you're in your 40's. It's small has a wheel in each corner, has front wheel drive, and a high revving transverse mounted engine. Sound familiar?

Some history: My first car, when I was 19 was a Morris 850 (a Mini) that my father bought from my sister and was never registed in my name. Like all first cars there is a lot of affection that is transferred to the Marque. Probably more because of the things that were done in and around it rather than the car itself. The first car is usually associated with a lot of other "firsts". It was cute, cheap to run and free. But it was also noisy, unreliable, difficult to work on, and yes gutless. That little 850cc engine and badly spaced four speed gearbox just wasn't up to the task. Even so, it was the Morris 850 that got me hooked on small front wheel drive cars. I just love the way you can throw them around corners.


My second car - the one that, to this day is still my favorite out of all of the cars I've owned, was a Fiat 127. It too was noisy and unreliable, and I paid far too much for it, but it was like a Mini on steroids. It handled well, had well spaced gears, and could rev forever. It had a slightly bigger engine (903cc i think) and more importantly it was designed by people who knew what they were doing. It was bright red, italian and was all mine.

The Getz is another step up from the Fiat. It has a 1400cc engine and handles brilliantly. When driving you just have to remember that the engine is small compared to most cars, and increase the revs to compensate. The only annoying feature I've found so far is the nanny-state-gear-switch which won't let you start the car unless the clutch is engaged, even if it's in neutral. I once drove a VW Beetle that wouldn't start with the clutch engaged because the heavy clutch spring put too much load on the battery. It just doesn't seem right starting an engine in any other way than in neutral with your foot off the clutch.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

New World Currency

The new measure of world currency is to be the phurphy. Being based on the balance point between the laws of physics and Murphy's law.

For each country the exchange rate is calculated thus:

1 phurphy = the value of 1 square metre of carpet

The particular carpet is selected using the following apparatus.

First take a cat and strap to its back a slice of toast, buttered side up, then drop it to the floor from a height of two metres. The cat will use the laws of physics to land feet first. The toast will use the laws of Murphy to land buttered side down. Obviously the way in which it lands will be determined by the value of the carpet on which it lands. By increasing the value of the carpet used at each attempt, eventually the cat will land on its side. Then the forces of physics and Murphy are seen to be in equilibrium.

This will set the values of the new world currency in each country based on natural laws, rather than the arbitrary market driven mumbo jumbo that the economists would have us all believe is the accepted norm.

Thursday, August 06, 2009

The Perfect Night In.

Vegetarian Singapore noodles, Magners, and Stargate SG1 on the telly. It doesn't get any better than this.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

The Dark Side of Archery


Some people (particularly some recurve archers) think the dark side of archery is the compound. But not so. The dark side is the evil sport of bowhunting.

I recently (Friday 24/4/09) bought a new bow. Woo Hoo! BTW.
It's a PSE Moneymaker, and it's a purpose built target bow. You can tell this by the deflex riser which means it's designed for precision rather than than power, the relatively long axle to axle measurement: precision rather than portability, and the color (not camo).

But PSE (and I think also most archery equipment suppliers) make most of their money from people who buy the short, reflex, high powered camo bows that they use to kill things with.

So it came with this DVD:

It's basically a collection of kill videos, showing the unsuspecting deer, coyote or bear being stalked by the well hidden fully camouflaged hunter. Then the shot, penetration, distressed animal running away, and pan back to the extremely adrenalin rushed hunter. Then of course the obligatory slow-mo replay, and fast forward to the proud hunter displaying the dead animal that he was responsible for, and describing the kill with all the articulation and coherence of a football player after the match. Like all pornography, it's repellent yet compelling at the same time. A bit like watching a train wreck.

I suppose the difference between a target archer and a bowhunter is their motivation. What to do on the weekend, shoot arrows or kill things?

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Rockwiz

Saw rockwiz last night. What a great show. What great (sometimes aria winning) duets at the end of each show. Last night was a replay of the Eddi Reader and Liam O'maonlai episode from back in 2006. Where they did a magical rendition of "Across the Universe". I suppose the show is taking a break after last weeks myer music bowl special.

It reminded me that the best thing I ever saw on that show and possible the best thing ever to air on Australian TV (i'm not joking, it blows me away every time I see it) was the Archie Roach & Sara Storer rendition of "From Little Things Big Things Grow". Here it is on YouTube . To me it's a reminder that around the fringe of this football-meat-pie-moronic-fundamentally-racist culture there exists some things which occasionally restore my ability to endure it.

Friday, January 23, 2009

New tennis hero


The first few rounds of a tennis tournament like the Australian Open are usually pretty boring. Household names pitted against never-heard-of's. The result is predictable the execution is tedious. That's what I thought I was in for last night, so halfway through the first set I switched off the Venus Williams / Carla Suarez Navarro match. Imagine my surprise when about an hour later, I turned the TV on to discover that not only was the match still going, Venus had lost the second set! So I watched the 3rd set score go from 5/2 to 5/7. The unseeded Carla Suarez Navarro had beaten Venus Williams! The great thing about watching a match like that, is that all the way through you don't believe it's going to happen, and are constantly being surprised. She's only 5ft 3in (160cm). She's a clay court baseline rallyer and her best shot is the cross court single handed backhand. When they tried to get her to do one of those wanky post match interviews, she laughed and said thanks very much but I've got nothing to say.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Last.fm and New Sound Card Gizmo

Life is too short to listen to the same music over & over again. But how to listen to streamed music in Hi Fidelity? Enter the Creative XMOD wireless Home audio system now I can listen to LastFM or Itunes or anything else via computer from the comfort of the lounge.